Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
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