you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
Took out half a tooth with a handle of jim beam last night. Apparently I can't walk and chug bourbon at the same time
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
Randomize
