We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
Randomize
