; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
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