Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Randomize
