I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
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