I'm laying in your front yard are you home
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
Someone came in the potted fern
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize
