I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
now i know why i became what i already was.
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
Randomize
