Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
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