The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
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