She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
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