last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
My new hangover cure is going for a haircut, just so the stylists give me a scalp massage during the shampoo.
That certainly explains the nine times your hair has looked different just this last month alone.
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize