i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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