just survived the first fart of the relationship.
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
