She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
Randomize
