problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
Randomize