sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
You made out with two different species that night
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize
