oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
my god I love twenty year old dicks
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
Randomize
