I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
Randomize