yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
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