38 yer olds are good kisserssss
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
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