You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
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