if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
Randomize
