I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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