I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
