In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
Naked Twister starts at high noon
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
you're hired as official boob wrangler
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
maybe you met your husband and you just don't know it yet
and other hilarious jokes you can tell yourself
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
Randomize
