its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
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