you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
