Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
Randomize