There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize
