Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
Randomize
