Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
just balanced a champagne glass on my gut. thanks to beer im a living breathing tempur-pedic mattress.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
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