Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
