wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
how does that bad decision feel?
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
Randomize
