as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
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