does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
Randomize
