Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
Why is there broken glass in my purse?
You stole a snow globe. From your VP. Soooo...maybe don't put all your hopes on that promotion you were expecting
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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