Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
Randomize
