I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
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