just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize