Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Randomize
