i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
She told me she brought a guy home but that he looked pickled. And no, that's not an autocorrect.
Hahahah pickled
I asked her what she meant and she said that he looked like he had soaked in water.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
Randomize
