Farmville is her only friend.
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
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