That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
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