I tried to use my car keys to open my door
I just started a sentence with yellow.
hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
Randomize
