Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
Randomize