i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
Randomize
