and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
Randomize
