D3 body, D1 cock
would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
Convinced the bartender that I'm a congressman. Free Drinks. God bless America.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
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