in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
is it fun? or sober?
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
